Metropolitan

'Aburokyire Abrabor: Ghanaian life abroad.' is a series featuring the stories of individuals who have travelled to foreign countries for the same purpose; the hope of a better life for themselves and their families. Some are stories of success, but others are not so lucky. Some are, in their words, ‘trapped’ abroad.

In part one, the story of a married Ghanaian man, stuck between a rock and a hard place, is featured. As an ‘over-stayer,’ he shunned the idea of marrying a foreigner for ‘nkraata enti,’ leaving him little alternative than to live illegally in the UK, or return home without having made progress, and considered a failure.

“I had a phone call at midnight that a loved one was very ill. What can I do? My phone is a yam, so as early as 8 o’clock in the morning, I had to rush down to the nearest money transfer shop to send money back home, even though my work starts at 7.30am. Yet another day that I have to call my office and lie that I’m running late, or there are no trains. Days go by, months go by; family back home have been told that their loved one is not going to survive and might pass away in a couple of days time, but they still insist on money from me, as someone is trying to get rich before the loved one passes away.”

“I receive a phone call but I was at work so I couldn’t pick it up. During my lunch break I listened to my voice message. A sorrowful voice, a tearful voice, informing me that the loved one is dead. What am I going to do next? I have money, but I wouldn’t call myself rich. How painful is it that I can only send money? So I can’t get a day, a chance to go home and bid this person farewell? What an honour it would have been to be there to see my loved one laid in state and mourn her from my heart instead of from my pocket, but I can’t. I’ve been here for many years, but I still haven’t made the breakthrough that others have, only because I wanted to be truthful and faithful to you my wife back home and not marry another abroad for abrokye nkraataa. I still haven’t got what it takes to go back home and come back to do the job that I do. What a shame, what a painful life. When will it end? When will I go back home and not think of coming back? I have a letter from my wife. My first born has arrived, a boy! What father won’t be happy? I have a son oh yes, I have a son.”

“The best of time I spend with my son is on the phone. If I should calculate the number of days, the number of hours I have spent with my son, in 12 years it would just be three days because I only get to talk to him for 30 minutes of my week schedule. What a pity. What boy wouldn’t love to see his dad and go to the park with him? I wish I could do so. I wish I could tell my son I love him more. I wish I could hold him. This boy is craving for a sibling, but none is coming. His mother has chosen to be faithful to me, because we are married. Christianity does not recommend divorce, so she can’t move on. But anytime I tell my family and my wife that I want to come back and live the life of a married man, she stops me. She says no. Keep riding the little hope that you have. When am I going to have another child? When is my son going to enjoy the bond of fatherhood and son? Is this life for real? Is this what western life is going to do to me? Oh when will I go back home? When will I decide never to come back again? It is painful, it is painful.”

by Karen Mcklaren